Today I think I well and truly deserve a Cycle Proficiency badge, surely cycling amongst the Spanish drivers, who not only like to gesticulate out of their window but also drive on the wrong side of the road is worthy of such a small recognition,
Nowadays I wouldn’t get a badge, probably because health and safety are frightened that the children will do themselves some damage with the pin, or maybe swallow them, and the school will get sued by some cotton wool wrapping parent!
Come to think of it if I was taking the test now I wouldn’t be allowed to fail, there can be no winners and losers for children these days for fear that it will scar them psychologically for the rest of their lives. Maybe I could sue the Department of Education now for all the bad decisions I’ve ever made, the impact of being the only one to fail in the school left me with deep seated scars and fears of rejection!
So this is what I should have got then, which I think I should get today, albeit some 30 plus years later.
Yes, if you haven’t worked it out by now we took the bikes out, and yes I did cycle, and yes true to form, Craig was shouted obscenities at by an older Spanish gentlemen, I’m starting to think that maybe there’s some pensioner club somewhere and they’ve got a photo of Craig there. ‘If you see this man abuse or accost him’.
Now just to prove I cycled this photo was taken by an independent third party, my friend Val, who just happened to be at the Department store we cycled to. And yes she was as amazed that I’d made it as I was.